| Episode: | 5 | | | Writer: | J. Michael Straczynski | | | Air Date: | 23-Feb-1994 |
Today on Sci-Fi Adventures, I've made it 22.7% of the way through season one of Babylon 5!
The season hasn't been all that great so far, but I'm more hopeful about Parliament of Dreams. This was the first episode to be scripted after filming on the series began, so writer JMS had much better idea of how the actors were performing his characters, and could shape his words to fit their mouths.
Wait, why does this screencap look so familiar to me? Oh right, Born to the Purple used the same establishing shot to put its title over a couple of episodes ago... except it was a bit less pink back then. I'm surprised this doesn't happen more often to be honest. CGI's cheaper than filming models, but time spent rendering new stock shots is time they could better spend producing effects for the story.
This review is going to be a bit SPOILERY, as I'm going to reveal basically everything that happens in the episode, and maybe even a few things about what came before it, but I won't spoil a thing about what comes after it.
Or maybe he was just called over when this guy made a fuss about not being allowed to bring his ceremonial dagger on board. Garibaldi basically tells him that he’s going to put it out on the hull and if his god lets him get it without a space suit he can keep it. He’s not in a good mood.
But then he catches a glimpse of a woman he knows walking in off a ship, and suddenly he's got more urgent things to do. He lets his friend take over here, even leaves him the knife to play with.
“I'm thinking of thinking of sending her flowers right after Bonnie gets back. So many fishies left in the sea. So many fishies but no-one for me.“Must be an classic song from the Narn homeworld. He picks up the head from his plate, but before he can take a bite he's interrupted by the doorbell.
One of the things that's been irritating me about the series is how everyone immediately yells something like "Enter!" when they hear someone at the door without even checking who it is! And the door then unlocks for them. In the Soul Hunter episode there was a literally a serial killer at the door and they came this close to losing an ambassador, so you’d think they’d have more sense now.
G’Kar tries to get back to enjoying his meal (after dragging the live crayfish back to his plate), but curiosity gets the better of him and he puts the video on. Turns out it's from an old enemy of his, who just wanted to let him know that by the time he watches this he'll be dead... and G'Kar will be joining him soon.
ACT ONE.
He reveals that he has left orders that his considerable assets are to be liquidated upon his death to give G’Kar the best assassination money can buy and promises that he will be dead within 48 hours of receiving the message.
“Already my agent is close to you. You will not know who, or how, or where until it is too late.”
His visitor claims to be Na’Toth, his new diplomatic attache. Wow, Ko D'Ath didn’t last long did she? In fact I think I think she only made the one appearance, back in Born to the Purple.
Sinclair’s a bit shaken by this. Seems that Sinclair and Catherine have a history and Garibaldi wanted to give him a heads-up before he bumped into her accidentally. Sinclair doesn’t much want to bump into her deliberately either, though he does he does ask if she was with anyone.
Vir explains that the ceremony started back when his people fought for survival against another sentient race on their world called the Xon. Every year they'd count up how many people hadn't died and celebrate their good fortune. “Do you know what the last Xon said, just before he died?” asks Londo. Then he clutches his heart and yells “Agghhhh!”
The humans at the table force a grin but it’s clear that they’re suffering. Maybe not as much as Ambassador Delenn, but she has to suffer in silence as she still hasn’t got an aide of her own to share her misery with. Wow, it's been a while since Londo, G'Kar and Delenn were all in an episode together like this. No sign of telepath Talia Winters though.
Sinclair takes his role as a diplomat very seriously, but seeing Catherine again is starting to seem a lot more appealing by comparison, so he sneaks out and leaves Garibaldi and Ivanova to struggle on without him.
Ivanova seems to be genuinely enjoying herself for once, and she asks Londo what the deal with all the statues is. This was a mistake, as the ambassador climbs up onto the table and starts explaining them all. Loudly.
Usually the way things work for Sinclair is that whenever he gets five minutes of free time Ivanova calls him with a problem. But this time he had the bright idea of taking his link off and putting it in his pocket so he wouldn't be interrupted. Which gets a bit embarrassing when Catherine points out that his pants are talking to him.
Turns out that the two of them have known each other forever, going through the same routine every three years or so of accidentally running into each other, dating and then screwing everything up. They’re wiser now though, they understand how this always plays out and they know it’s best to just avoid each other. So Sinclair invites her to dinner and she says yes.
By the way, Caitlin Brown as Na’Toth is a perfect pair for Andreas Katsulas as G’Kar as they have a similar level of smug self-assuredness and attitude, being larger than life without turning scenes into pure camp. Plus she doesn’t just hiss and throw people into tables like Ko D'Ath did. Poor Butz...
Na'Toth points out the Narn assassin's guild has a tradition of leaving a black flower for the victim to find, so he'd know if someone was really trying to kill him. He hasn't found a flower, so maybe his nemesis was just lying to make him paranoid! Now I'm wondering if G'Kar has figured out yet that Sinclair pulled a similar trick on him with a non-existent tracking device back in The Gathering.
Okay back when I wrote about Born to the Purple I mentioned that comedy music doesn’t belong anywhere near Babylon 5, and I have to admit that I was wrong. I mean 99% of the time it's terrible, but this scene is only enhanced by the creepy lullaby version of G’Kar’s ‘fishy’ song playing right now. “I’m thinking of thinking of sending her flowers” turned out to be foreshadowing! Kind of.
ACT TWO.
G'Kar: “And you have no idea how that got into my bed?”G'Kar explains that he can't go to Sinclair for help, because... uh… sorry, I’m getting distracted by the amazing alien make up on these two. We’re getting a lot of G’Kar this week and most of that is chin. He can't ask Sinclair for help because he'd have to reveal things he did while on the council, which may compromise planetary security! No really; he hasn't exactly been the most sympathetic or honourable character so far, but the guy cares about his people.
Na'Toth: “Ambassador it is not my place to speculate on how anything gets into your bed.”
Wait, G'Kar was/is on his world's ruling council? Seems like he and Delenn have more in common than they know. Anyway, he eventually decides to send Na'Toth to find that courier from the teaser, while he goes to arrange for some protection.
Perhaps Delenn can get a bit more screen time now that she has a character to confide in. They can talk about how she’s secretly Satai Delenn of the Grey Council for instance, though she makes it absolutely clear that he MUST TELL NO ONE. We’re still holding onto that mystery for a while.
That means all the major ambassadors finally have an attaché! Well except for Kosh, but he's never around anyway. The cryptic conversations he could get up to with another Vorlon on board would be incredible though.
* Reminder: Babylon 5 is one of the most respected speculative fiction series to ever air on television. *
I had no idea these minor characters were going to keep showing up like this, and I'd be happier if they didn't. Sure I smile when N'Grath appears, he's a dopey looking mantis puppet, but I want Babylon 5 to be better than this! Farscape totally could've pulled him off though.
The actors were certainly up to delivering their dialogue in the manner it was intended, but when the mellow synths showed up on the soundtrack this all got a bit too cheesy for me.
Delenn’s monologue here is about death couched in the promise of new life, and renewal disguised as defeat (and so on) and poor G’Kar is looking uncomfortable throughout. He could be assassinated at any moment, his bodyguard hasn’t shown up, and Delenn keeps saying ‘death’, so the man is less than enthusiastic when offered a fruit to eat as part of the ceremony. This leads to a joke so subtle I didn’t even notice until it was pointed out to me:
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| I've frozen everything but the hand to make it easier to see (and keep the filesize down). |
And after stealing Ivanova's fruit he still doesn’t dare eat it.
One nice touch I noticed is that Ambassador Londo eats his fruit without hesitation, then nods to Vir that he should eat his too. Garibaldi on the other hand just puts his back down; the guy really isn't getting into the spirit of these ceremonies at all.
ACT THREE.
Soon Garibaldi’s in there investigating the death, which is something G’Kar doesn’t need. Especially when his keen investigative eye draws him to some pink underwear behind a chair cushion. A momentary grin comes across the ambassador's face before his brain catches up.
Funny how it took someone to die for Garibaldi to cheer up a bit. Also G'Kar showed hints of being able to pull off a comedy plotline back in Born to the Purple, but he's killing it in this episode.
Oh right, this scene’s about us learning that Catherine works as a planetary surveyor, and her learning that her last find has earned her a considerable amount of cash. She’s got no one to celebrate with though…
Now we’re back to the romance plot, which is more of a ‘should we give in and let ourselves slip back into a relationship that never ever works’ plot. I don’t want to criticise the dialogue in this scene, as it might sound a bit forced and unnatural but it was apparently based on the writer’s (painful) true experiences. Also Catherine quotes Tennyson at one point and poetry just bounces right off me, so I'm aware I'm down at the shallow end when it comes to critical analysis.
Wait, I've figured out what's wrong with this scene!
Oh and of course Sinclair gets interrupted by someone calling him on his link again.
Meanwhile G’Kar’s finally gotten hold of that courier who gave him the data crystal at the start of the episode and during their conversation he figures out that Na’Toth is the assassin sent to kill him!
ACT FOUR.
G’Kar wakes up in one of the dirtier parts of the station to discover he's wearing some new wrist and neckwear. They’re called paingivers, though they’ll also double as deathgivers if G’Kar comes within five feet of the counterfeit courier, so strangling him is off the table.
Back in G’Kar’s quarters, Na’Toth walks in to find the place deserted. See, people can just walk into people’s quarters uninvited with no key! No wonder 40% of the major ambassadors have been kidnapped from the own homes by murderers in the last five episodes.
Na'Toth notices the paingivers and isn’t impressed, saying that they’re crude and unimaginative, and begins to demonstrate her own alternative method of prolonged torture: kicking the ambassador until he's unconscious. G'Kar's been having a bit of a crappy week.
The assassin’s still on the fence about whether to believe she really is his backup though and unfortunately for Na’Toth any doubt is too much doubt in his line of work, so now he’s going to kill her too.
Na’Toth’s beating was more surgical than it appeared, as she was kicking him in a way that damaged the paingivers. Still hurt like a bastard though... and she still enjoyed it.
Finally an episode where G’Kar gets to be the wily hero! Kind of.
ACT FIVE.
Na’Toth: "I don’t hear any drums."I’m cringing so bad right now.
Vir: "Or bells!"
* Long pause as the camera pans over the entire cast. *
Lennier: "Or chants! Are you sure that we've come to the right place?"
And it turns out that Earth’s dominant belief in 2258 is…
The episode ends with Sinclair leading the ambassadors into shaking hands with a representative from each in turn, introducing them by their name and religion as the screen fades to black.
Personally I'm not a fan of this ending, as greeting a couple of hundred people in a row doesn’t help anyone understand them better, it only shows that you have an amazing memory (and by the producer’s account actor Michael O’Hare actually did, as he only needed to be told the names twice to remember them all). Londo and Delenn showed legitimate religious ceremonies that gave us insight into their cultures, while this is just some bullshit Sinclair came up with at the last second. Plus it’s boring as fuck for everyone involved!
And how’d he find all these people in the middle of deep space anyway? Were they already on the station in their full religious attire or did he ship them all in from Earth? Okay okay they’ve got a major religious event going on this week, so I suppose it’s possible or even likely that they were already here for that (like knife pilgrim at the start) and he just rounded them up. Plus to be fair, writer JMS explained later that the point of the scene wasn’t intended to be ‘check out how many religions we’ve got, you monocultured aliens!’ it’s ‘check out how much respect we have for our many religions’. Basically humanity's dominant belief is that all beliefs are respected. B5's universe is far from a utopia, but we've come that far at least.
CONCLUSION
Parliament of Dreams, more like ‘G’Kar’s Wacky Assassination Mystery’. I’m surprised to see a G’Kar focused comedy/romance episode so soon after a Londo focused comedy/romance episode, but I’m not complaining as this is a lot better. The first genuinely enjoyable episode for me since the season opener in fact. Even the small moments worked for me this time, like Garibaldi rescuing the glasses during Londo’s table crawl, Sinclair’s pants talking to him, G’Kar’s panties being on display and the surreptitious fruit swap.
The episode was basically broken into two plotlines which weaved between the religious ceremonies, and personally I didn't find Sinclair’s awkward conversations with Catherine to be a welcome break from the comedy. But whenever G'Kar came back on screen I suddenly gave a damn again, especially if he was sharing it with his new sidekick Na'Toth. G'Kar's been the closest thing the series has had to an antagonist so far, considering how every time he turns up he's involved in an attempted assassination or military occupation (plus there was that line he had about exterminating the Centauri and turning their bones into flutes), but here he finally gets an A-plot of his own and he owns it. Trying to save his own life doesn't exactly put him on the side of the angels, but it's nice to see him straying from the role of the villain.
Though for an episode based around religious ceremonies (to the point where the title basically means organization of religion) this has surprisingly little to say about religion. We learn that the Centauri have a lot of gods and use religion as an excuse to pour drinks and get the lutes out, we learn that the Minbari are deeply spiritual and like triangles, and we learn that Earth has apparently got a lot better at religious tolerance in the last two centuries. But the shocking twist is that Earth Central turned out to be right this time, and the ceremonies really did help them understand each other better, instead of triggering a holy war across the station. So that's nice!
I kind of want to put Parliament of Dreams above Midnight on the Firing Line and say it's my favourite episode so far, but Midnight introduced the Starfuries and kicked off major story arcs, while this keeps veering off into Sinclair and Catherine's cheesy romance, so I can't. But it's a step up from the last three for sure.
Babylon 5 will return with Mind War. But coming up next on Sci-Fi Adventures is Deep Space Nine's Q-Less.
Your welcome to leave a comment in the box below if you like! I know its existence kind of implies that, but I'm making it explicit.
The Thinking of Thinking song sounds Gilbert and Sullivan -esque. Cribbed from one of their operettas?
ReplyDeleteYou're on the right lines. From writer JMS: "The "fishy" song was composed by Christopher Franke specifically for that scene. I told him I wanted sort of a Narnish Gilbert and Sullivan, and that's what we got."
DeleteCool. Thanks for the quick response. Good to know I wasn't thinking of that for nothing.
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